And I Shall Name Thou ... Uhm


Didn't we all laugh at the complete incompetence of Clarkson, Hammond, May, and production team when they couldn't come up with a name for their show. It can't be that hard. Then again who am I to judge? I can hardly come up with article titles. My blog is named after my twitter, which is named after an idea I had while driving over a bridge. I don't name my car, mostly because I couldn't come up with something. If I had to christen a car model it would end up being very Audi-ish: the Car One. Of course, I laughed about the bloke who named a car party in Spanish, or the other woman who named one after an island.

Then something horrid happened. I got accepted as a tribe leader. It's one of the best things that happened this year, but also one of the worst, because, now, it was me. I had to come up with a name. I would be the twat everyone would be laughing at if I'd call it la tribu. Even worse was A's joking that they should pick a name for me, because I'd moan for weeks.

Evidence of my suffering 
For the record, I did not moan for weeks. I wailed around in pain. There is a difference.

With my creative hat on, and a digital notepad always by my side, I went out in this world thinking. It should sum things up. But it should also be catchy. I applied by saying that I am "solving absurd problems that people encounter during their daily motoring adventures". The very very first idea I had was Simple Solutions. It does what it says on the tin, and it's simple. Perfect.

Except that I remembered that Drive Tribe has a tendency to shorten tribes down to their initials. This would have meant the simple title Simple Solutions would have been shortened to SS. Maybe nobody would have bothered. After all the tribe Oh Bugger has been shortened as OB, and nobody seems to have noticed that it's a German tampon brand as well. However, I am Austrian, hence SS is not a very bright idea. Not at all. No. Never. Throwing that out of the window at once.

Here I was back to square one ... luckily an idea came to me. Maybe I can create a play with these initials. If I already have to pay attention to them in order to not accidentally create a Nazi acronym, I could make good use of them as well. I could come up with anything that would be shortened as ABS, or ESP, or TC ...

Sadly, this turned out to be harder than I first thought, not only because you have to find three words that make sense in that combination and there was a sign limit. I binned this idea, and went on thesaurus instead. I was trying to look up synonyms for simple, and if I had to absurd. AS didn't sound too nice. To be honest, absurd is not a pretty word. Would I really like a word that would describe my tribe? It's like "funny article," "cool car," "long penis," nobody would ever believe it.

Hope almost lost, I went to the bathroom, cleaned my teeth, and thought a bad word. That word turned out to be my salvation. I thought to myself, if I'd call my tribe Bizarre Solutions, then it would be shortened as BS. I really, really liked that idea. It is a bit naughty, clever-ish, a somewhat hidden joke, and on top of that it fits my tribe!

The only thing I needed to do before that was look up how exactly you spell bizarre ...


For those who can't get enough of me my tribe can be found here:
drivetribe.com


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