An Ending Is Needed for A New Beginning

I was vaguely aware of it. But I intended on ignoring it. Someone mentioned that Thursday this week marks the one year anniversary when Jeremy Clarkson got suspended. I've talked enough about it, I know enough - too much maybe but I won't repeat it. Let history be history, accept that it happened, and it can't be changed but if you're lucky learn from it. Despite this being such a mundane thing to happen, it reminded me of valuable life lessons:
People are never black and white, nor are they only good or bad - just look at your friends, look at yourself. Sometimes people just slip, they say something they shouldn't have, they get frustrated, angry and then hurt others without meaning to. But this is not an excuse, it is reason. But even if they do everything right afterwards, it's for you to decide if that person is still worth your attention ...

However, the most important thing I have taken away from those events was that sometimes things have to break to make room for something new and with luck for something better.

Despite having learnt this in a rather bizarr way, it is very important. Especially since I only recently entered my twenties and have to learn how to run my life all on my own. This meant realizing that sometimes an ending is not bad. Sometimes it is even needed.

Only last year I decided that a friendship I had had for almost ten years wasn't worth maintaining any longer. Every time he wrote a text I groaned. I made up excuses so I didn't have to meet him any longer. The texts kept getting shorter and shorter. At least on my side. Suddenly it struck me, I wasn't happy with this friend. He seemed perfectly fine with things, and we had been friends for so long. It wasn't easy to let go of something I had had for so long ...

Now imagine if you were in a long relationship and you realize it isn't fulfilling any longer. Neither are you willing to fix it. Of course, after years of being together you could get scared of being alone again. Of having to jump into the dating pool and hope that somewhere a half-decent person will appear. But what's the alternative? Being stuck in a relationship you're not happy with ... That's not right.

However, routine is a fine thing. Breaking it, losing something you have been used to for years, adjusting to a sudden change, that can be very hard and scary.
But please remember that while you may not see it at the very moment: an ending is not always bad. Very rarely it is. You'll move on, and with just a tiny bit of luck will find something better.

Let's play this on the example of Top Gear: had Clarkson never been let go, yes, I would have gotten a nice 23rd series, but then again I would have never flown to London and had never seen their live show - one of my best weekends of my life. I would still be utterly terrified of an aeroplane, and I wouldn't have met A. or Laura. I wouldn't have been hugged by someone who has an aversion to touch. This is just me.

Despite the way it ended, in a possibly twisted way I am glad it did. Now the former Top Gear presenters have a gig with Amazon. They have more time to make their episodes. They can make them how they want.
But what struck me the most that Top Gear ending wasn't only bad is this: One day I saw a photo of Clarkson just a week old, and then another from 2012. The strange thing was that despite being a bit fatter, and less hair were on his head, the lines which I thought were permanent were gone now. He looked more relaxed.


So I thought to myself, hmm, maybe this ending was needed. Maybe before it would have gone down far worse. And how else would they have managed to secure a gig with which they seemed to be happier?

Then I began to apply this on life. How often would it have been simpler if someone just had had the guts to say "we need to end this?"
What about a job that you've lost interest in? Find it in yourself to get up, quit the old job and find sometimes that makes you happy. Otherwise you might lie on your death bed and wonder why didn't I just try?
Your field of study is wrecking you, but you keep at it because you have no idea what else to do? Find a quiet moment to figure out what else you could do, what other interests tickle your fancy. Making the change itself is scary, but a short afterwards you will realize it was the right thing.
Why is it bad when a couple divorces after 30 years but both decided that they weren't happy any longer? At least this way they can try to find their luck somewhere else and be happy once more.
It's the same with friendships, sometimes you just grow apart and it isn't worth it any longer ...

Yes, change is hard, and a bit scary, but sometimes things have to end. Otherwise there is no room for something new and better.


0 Kommentare: